Emily: "Okay, so that's exactly what's happening here. But just go put on the damn dress, Mary, because that woman scares me more than you do."

There was a soft knocking on the door. Mary turned and opened it a crack.

Sales woman: "Emily dear, Laura picked these gloves out for you because of your… special circumstances."

The sales woman handed Mary a pair of long white opera gloves trimmed in hot pink sequins and feathers. Mary closed the door and held the gloves out to Emily.

Emily: "Oh."
Mary: "My."
Emily: "God…"
Mary: "It's not too late to fake our own deaths. We could push the car off the Deception Pass bridge.

Emily: "She'd know. She'd find us. She'd kill us and she'd stuff our bodies and dress us in these horrible things, prop us up next to the alter, and when it was all over she'd bury us in these awful hot pink monstrosities for all eternity!"
Mary: "Emily, get a grip!"
Emily: "Feathers, Mary! Opera gloves with Hot. Pink. Feathers."
Mary: "I know. But I'm the one with a size forty-six butt bow. My ass was never this big!"

Emily: "I wonder what really happened to her other bridesmaids."
Mary: "You don't think…"
Emily: "Look at the dresses, Mary. The woman is clearly demonic."
Mary: "And the way she has to have everything just so… it's like she's planning for some sort of bizarre ritualistic… demonic thing. The florist even mentioned that her flowers were an unusual combination. I didn't think to ask why, but maybe there's something to it. So what do we do?"

Emily: "We can't let her do to us whatever she did to her last bridesmaids. Either she killed them or they went mad, because I can't imagine she would have let something insignificant like a scheduling conflict get in the way of her perfect wedding. She must be stopped."
Mary: "And god knows what she'll do to her poor fiancé once she gets him up to the altar."

Emily took a breath and set the gloves down.

Emily: "Do you think we might be overreacting a little?"
Mary: "Maybe a little. But there is definitely something weird going on here, I can feel it. No one with human retinas would pick out this color. So what should we do?"
Emily: "We're going to have to take one for humanity, suck it up and try on these damn dresses."

Mary: "Screw humanity, I like the car off the bridge plan better. We could always leave the dresses in the trunk, thereby averting an eternity in hot, holographic pink."
Emily: "I'm serious, Mary. We need to find out what's going on here. Don't you think it's strange that Laura just happened to decide to get married in Deception Pass, and the two of us just happen to live here now? Look at all the weird things we've been through. This town is a magnet for the bizarre and evil. I think we should stick close to Laura and get to the bottom of this. I know it's far more frightening than vampires or demons or zombies, but we can be brave. Are you in?"

Mary sighed.

Mary: "Okay, I'm in. But after this, we really need to find jobs."